Video game masturbation

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The shooting on the Virginia Tech campus was only hours old, police hadn't even identified the gunman, and yet already the perpetrator had been fingered and was in the midst of being skewered in the media. Video games. They were to blame for the dozens dead and wounded.

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Take a step back and the video was actually just quite funny and, in its machine-gunning, wall-smashing, robo-coppish ultra-violence, very traditional. And, while the demographics and gender balance of gaming are continually changing, many video games are still built by men, for men; it really does matter to us if our brains are being zapped while we are engaged in virtual self-pleasuring. The median age of gamers is actually about 35, and there are more middle-aged women playing video games than teenage boys.

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Become a fan of Slashdot on Facebook. That, and the free market. TFS puts it in plain sight: "I wish i was watching porn because I'll never get rejected [by porn]".

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Thanks for connecting! You're almost done. Connect to your existing Cracked account if you have one or create a new Cracked username. The rest of the gaming industry has gotten awfully jealous of all the money Nintendo is making with their Wii and all its unconventional controllers.

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Online is a strange and terrifying place. Early adult business made serious cash, and the demographic surveys conducted by Pornhub get more respondents than Gallup polls. A lot of people are using this thing to get their rocks off, and more power to them.

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Every Wednesday at 3pm PT. Every Friday at 3PM! Every Friday.

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Video games have a lot in common with porn. That's not meant as a criticism—some of the best minds in the business have compared the two as a way to advocate on behalf of the creative merits of both. But here's the thing: once you accept that video games are often structurally similar to porn, what does that say about actually playing them?

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He is a lookout for the Boarding School. It is unknown where Willy lived before being sent to Ericson's Boarding School; however, he claims to have been sent there for "chronic masturbation". Due to the fact he would have been at the most five years old when he was sent to Ericson's, it is unclear whether Willy was joking or not. During the early days of the outbreak, the teachers at the school left Willy along with rest of the children to fend for themselves.

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Players control two nude women; the goal is to catch semen in their mouths, which is falling from a masturbating man on a rooftop, without missing. Its gameplay has been compared to the Atari game Kaboom! There is also a gender-reversed version of the game titled Philly Flasher that features identical gameplay.

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Many of you have asked if I am OK. Many more have pointed out that I am a faggot—thank you. I suppose writing about your own semi-agonizing experience of having had cancer and depression, and couching all that in the context of your recent layoff, and proceeding to discuss your drug and alcohol use, your passing resemblance to Walter White, your crying jags, your sense of loss, loathing, desperation—I suppose that kind of stuff will elicit such a response.

Comments

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